A Crisis of Faith

So for the handful of people who check this blog semi-regularly, you will likely have noticed a recent drop in the amount of new material I’ve been posting.  Truth be told, of late my heart just hasn’t been in it.

It had reached the point that I was trying to churn out material every two weeks, whether I wanted to or not, out of the expectation (or the perceived expectation) of my players to keep the game rolling.  I would get something together, that I felt would be decent, only to have my players thwart and derail all of my plans and ideas.  I’m not one that ever wants to railroad my players, but there has been a few times when I would watch my carefully laid out ideas get destroyed and wonder “Why can’t you guys just once, let the story flow the way it was supposed to?”

My wife, who has been gaming with me since the very beginning over 15 years ago, has dropped the hobby, as the way the games progress every time frustrates her.  We have a couple of dominant voices in the group and they seem to take charge and narrate the mission, rather than allowing the quieter players try different things and this has led to friction and frustration amongst the players.

So, between my frustrations as a GM, with my own inability to challenge my players to any degree, the frustrations of my players and the apparent disconnect from what everyone seems to want from these games, I have gone on hiatus from the game, at least from my core group.

I still plan on running conventions… different players, who haven’t been immersed in my particular game style for so many years, bring a fresh perspective to the table and re-invent the game for me, which I really appreciate, especially now with my desire to just throw my hands up and walk away not far below the surface.

I am currently working on new material, but I am taking my time with it, rather than rushing it out the door.  My hope is that with proper development time, I can better circumvent my players’ cunning and have a game go according to plan for a change.  It is also becoming apparent that I need to overhaul my style of GMing, as my whole let-the-players-work-it-out method of freeform play is allowing the alpha gamers to control the evening and that was never my intent.

So we’ll see what comes from the downtime and whether anything will truly change as a result.

~ by 1nsomniac on June 18, 2013.

3 Responses to “A Crisis of Faith”

  1. It is a shame when a group loses its way. I am sorry to hear that things have come to this pass, and hope that after a period of time recharging you can reshuffle the deck, as it were, and get back to the fun of things.

    I hope you will continue to post seeds and scenarios here. It would be a shame to lose your contributions.

    • Yeah, I miss the games, but fear that if I were to go back too soon, I’d end up frustrated further. But, I do plan on continuing to make material. I will still attend conventions and I’m already preparing two new scenarios in preparation for that. Once 5th Edition is fully launched, I will likely have a few things to say in that regard as well. 🙂

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